Good thing your father has been in Africa, Kim.

The Ebert bedtime television ritual is usually a combination of the following: House, ESPN, some police reality show, and a rerun of some UFC fight. Mind you, we don't spend four hours watching TV as we nestle into sleepy mode. Derrel has what we in the field call Remote ContrOCD. In our studies we have learned that often times, he will change the channel merely out of habit, and not necessarily because he is unhappy with the current programming. When I say 'we', I mean wives, and 'the field' would be husbandology. This should not be confused with the breeding and raising of livestock. That was their mother's responsibility.

But I digress. In the blip of Sports Center that we caught last night, we heard Dallas Stars hockey player Sean Avery make a very crude comment in reference to his ex-girlfriend dating other hockey players. We didn't hear all of the interview, but the term "sloppy seconds" found its way in and, thankfully, that was the trigger that got us over to channel 58 (for a second). This morning the front page of our internet had a picture of Kim Bauer, Jack's ridiculous daughter in the world that is '24'. She is the American Idol to my Arrested Development; the Cameron to my House. I clicked on to the back section of the internaper to make sure she didn't mess with January 11's launch of season 7.

Turns out Kim Bauer is the ex-girlfriend of the gentlemanly Sean Avery. Apparently the gal likes hockey. Whatever the reason, let's just be grateful that her antics will keep her out of CTU. You're a lucky guy, Sean. Had he not been helping African kids to asylum in the U.S., Jack Bauer would have been dropping down from the Teletron during your game, in a hail of gunfire.